Enjoying life through adventures, and capturing the passion through a lens.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Breathe out the bad??

Hold on to the good, breathe out the bad.

As we end this year, I hope you look back and take everything in that has happened.  Every year (good or bad) has built the foundation we stand on and and whether or not it was good, it shapes you into the person you are today....
This year I have found it hard to be optimistic about what has happened but when I look back I know I am exactly where I am supposed to be right now.. I am finding myself, I am pushing through to be the mom I can be, I accepting I will impact this world...whether I am this blogger or a mom or a rock star God WILL use me the way he created me....no matter what other people believe about me I am a warrior for the cause of change (it's even in my name that I am a warrior).

I hope you come to the realization you are worth more than you believe, you are more impactful than you see.....the change you believe in, fight for your right to be marvelous,

I hope this session finds you well.

This was the most extreme I have done but honestly since I was not at my computer and using my tools I decided to branch out instead of twitching... 
so the first one was inspired by my oldest as we were running around the block. He pointed out and asked, "Who is that old lady?" and my first response was to tell him not to say that because it was rude and his response. "Why? Isn't that what she is?"   I am always reminded that children don't see the world like the jaded adult. They see things for face value and point out the truth. It's so sad as adults we reprimand the truth our children bring out because it's rude. So this was inspired but the truth we try to correct. 
the others were just fun!


Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Lost Boys????

Imagination can only go as far as you let it...so unleash it and hope you get lost in the wonder it has to offer.

This week I was challenged by imagination and being afraid that I needed to harness it incase I was going to look silly. I woke up my best friend, put a whole bunch of play clothes in a box, and dragged all the above plus my boys to the beach to take pictures. Granted other options had been weighed into this idea but I kept think, "no I really want to go to the beach."  We made it and James just kept handing me lenses and when I'd get shy he'd go off, "what are you doing? Get in their and use the lens like its supposed to be used. Don't be afraid to get personal." 

After the shoot and feeling somewhat satisfied with what I got, we proceeded to head back to edit and once again I was pushed to do better than what I thought was good. James had me edit a pic and then he would show me what could have been different (not that one way was better than the other, but to get different points of views.) I learned more in those 3 hours than I have anywhere else. Why? Well, because I was challenged to get out of my comfort zone and use the wings I have. Whether or not I achieve my goal the first time I at least am unleashing my imagination and going where it leads me.

SO....without further ado, I give you the lost boys...may we always be lost in the world that inspires us to be better and/or marvelous.


Saturday, December 21, 2013

Fight for your right????

“Though she be but little, she is fierce!” - William Shakespeare

This year has been wide awakening my not only for my eyes but also for my spirit.... As I look back I can honestly say I have been shaken to my very core and even though I didn't want it, I needed it. And at this very moment I am going to be the most vulnerable I have been in a while and whoever takes offense to this, my apologizes but it happens. 

I don't know how to start this at all except that with this time last year I was dealing with how to communicate with an ex husband, I was dealing with the fact that the only blood family I had here were my two sons who were trying to understand why mommy lives here and daddy lives there, and a boyfriend who had cheated on me.....which proceeded to take me into the new year I was having difficulties keeping my spirits high at work and was affecting my performance, which I spiraled downward to find myself if it was in a person or in a beer I just had lost my being. I proceeded to go to school as a CNA and almost got kicked out 2x because of a case of food poisoning and the other time was pink eye (my teacher and I were not the best of friends). And in the finally lecture phase and onto my clinicals I had a miscarriage that I kept quiet about because it was out of wedlock and I know it is very frowned upon and right before my test for school I had to go to the hospital for bleeding out and once again I was there in the hospital alone.  I scurried to Florida about a month later to see my grandmother who had surgery for a tumor and we found out she has stage 4 cancer and we didn't know how long she had left. I had a sit convo with my mom about everything that had happened that year and my laundry was presented to her. When I got home home I found out we were getting evicted because we couldn't pay rent and we had 2 weeks..woohoo was left homeless on part for bad saving and have been couch surfing....during this time I have sprained my wrist and off work for 2 weeks.  Also my childhood friend died...Zina was the most precious thing in the world. This day has reminded that vicious cycles spiral because now I am dealing with another breakup that was because well you guessed it....and on my way home from picking up my stuff, zion proceeds to cut his finger in the car...I pick him p to clean it and he throws up all down my back, in my boot, and on the car.....and all I can do it just laugh....

Well at the time I wasn't laughing but as I'm writing this tears are coming down my eyes remembering this year and laughing because at the end of the day and this stupid ass year......ive needed to go through it to prove I AM ALIVE, I GRADUATED AS A CNA, MY GRANDMA IS STILL ALIVE, MY SISTER IS PREGNANT, I HAVE A NEW JOB(coming soon).

No matter what is thrown in my way or in my face I can look it down in the face back and say, "ok, what else do you have?"  Yes my choices are my own and I handle things the way I did and do but I learn I move forward.  

So after my whatever this was here is my pic simple but states a lot to me..just took time to see it.
When you are in the dark there will always be that light and it will stay on until the sun comes up...no matter how dark it is God will still be your light to let you know he sees you, he cares about you, and he acknowledges your existence.. he created you for a reason and he wont ever let you out of his sight.

Fight for your right to be marvelous, because no one else will - me

Hope this finds you well,
Devin - the warrior